A Parent Playbook Resource

Live Q & A with Rosalee Lahaie Hera

Recorded October 21, 2021

Rosalee Lahaie Hera, BArtSc, MBA, PhD(abd)

Certified Sleep Consultant

Rosalee Lahaie Hera is a Certified Pediatric & Newborn Sleep Consultant, a Certified Potty Training Consultant, the founder of Baby Sleep Love and the co-founder of The Parent Playbook. She’s also a Mom to two beautiful little humans.

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Full Transcript

Recorded October 21, 2021

Hi, everyone.

So I’ll just introduce myself. I’m Rosalee.

I’m a mom of two little girls. I am a certified pediatric sleep consultant. So that covers the zero to six year plus age range. I’m also additionally certified in newborn sleep. So I work all the time and specialized with newborn zero to three months old.

There’s so much amazing prevention work we can do in that age group. I’m also certified as a potty training consultant. I am the founder of baby sleep love, and I’m the co-founder of the parent playbook alongside my friend and superstar pediatrician. Dr. Dina Kula, can you hear me family? You’re saying you can’t hear me. Okay. Let’s see if I can troubleshoot that quickly.

You can hear, oh, some people can hear and some people can’t. Okay. All right. Hopefully just turn up the volume on your speakers. Perhaps you may have to leave and come back in again, if you’re having any issues, but let me know. I’ll just type that out so that, you know, so turn up your volume or try coming back in.

Okay. So how this works is that I’m going to spend the next hour with you answering your questions and you can just have to type those right into the chat and we’ll get going. I try to get through as many as I possibly can during our time together. So you let you know which, which questions you may have and we’ll go from there.

I’ll tell you, you said you tried those things before writing. Yeah. Okay. Not quite sure because some of you can hear me in some of you, can’t not sure is anybody else having that issue that they can’t hear. Okay. Or is it just Italia? Sorry about that. Tahlia. Let’s see what else we could do, but let me know what questions you have for those of you that are in here to start taping your questions.

I’ll start answering those. Okay. Shannon, you said four month old is sleeping through the night, but won’t not for longer than 15 minutes in the crib, but will nap for hours on me during the day. So Shannon, this is a really excellent quote. Well, you didn’t actually ask me a question, but it’s a really excellent scenario to start off with,

because this is so, so, so common, absolutely. At this age. And the reason for that is your four month old is going through what I call or what we call from a biology of sleep perspective, the sleep wake cycle maturation process. That’s exactly what it sounds like. So his sleep wake cycles are maturing. They’re going from being more like a newborn sleep wake cycles to more like an out sleep wake cycles.

So what happens is in the middle of a sleep wake cycle, and yes, it can be as quick as 15 to 20 minutes. Sometimes at this age, they’re going through a very light sleep stage. And if they don’t yet know to fall asleep on their own, we’ll talk about that in a second. At the beginning of the sleep wake cycles have the beginning of a nap.

It’s very difficult for them to then put themselves back to sleep when they stir through that lighter period of sleep. And even if they know how to fall asleep initially on their own independently, at the beginning of the nap, sometimes it’s actually difficult for them to get back to sleep if they’re still in this sleeping cycle maturation process. So what are the things that we need to have in place to link the naps at this age?

Number one, we need to be falling asleep independently at bedtime at nighttime, nighttime needs to be independent. Number two, we need to be falling asleep independently for the neck that we’re working on. However, I would not work on independent knocks until you’ve got nighttime sleep solid. So for now, if he wants to sleep on you to get the best rest possible within this age appropriate week windows.

So the amounts of time you can spend being awake before he becomes overtired, gets a shot of cortisol, the stress hormone, let them sleep on you until you’ve established independence at night. Once you’ve done that, then you can return to this idea of establishing more independence. In the day. I work on one app at a time starting with that one,

putting a baby down a week, teaching them to sleep independently, following age appropriate week windows, making sure the room is a hundred percent pitch black. You’ve got continuous noise running. It’s cool enough. All of those perfectly sleep conducive environment tips that you’ve heard from me before, perhaps you have. And then the rest of it is about his maturity in that sleep wake cycle,

maturation process. Often the peak of that sleep wake cycle maturation process is marked by when they’re flipping from back to belly. So we always initially put them down on their backs in a hundred percent safe sleep space, but if they flip to belly on their own, they get there on their own. As long as they’re not swaddled with their arms in and they can move themselves out of a compromised breathing position,

we can leave them to sleep that way. And often this is when they start to consolidate and link the naps. That’s also the peak of the seatbelt psychometric process, as I mentioned, which means that you’re on the down slope of that mountain and he’s starting to put together how to connect there, those sleep wake cycles. So hopefully that makes sense. There’s a number of different things that have to happen and get lined up properly to make sure that he’s able to link the naps in the crib before he’s falling asleep independently,

though, he will sleep longer on you and you will get shorter naps if you try to put him down, all right, Lara, you said what’s a good seat schedule for a 16 month old on one nap. So Laura 16 months on one nap, I don’t often recommend just one affidavit, 16 months, Dr. D and I are both quite strong.

In this opinion, we definitely recommend two naps a day at this age, if you can maintain that. And a lot of times what happens is that parents will move kiddos down to one that day too early, because they’re allowing lots of sleep in the morning nap. And then when we’ve got lots of steep in the morning nap, there’s not much sleep left in their take.

So to speak for the afternoon nap. So cutting that first snap down to an hour max and using a big week window before nap to as much as four hours usually helps us to nail that second nap. And sometimes we even need to cut the first nap down to 45 minutes. And yes, it’s far preferable to get two shorter naps in the day,

rather than one big long nap. And I know that that can seem so counterintuitive, but remember that when we moved down to one nap, we’re getting a massive week window in the morning, six hours. And it’s a lot for some 16 month olds. That being said, if you’ve done all of that and you’re on a one nap schedule set schedule at this age,

what is the best schedule we want six hours of a week time before the first snap or the only nap I should say, and that nap happening no earlier than 1230. And then on the other end of the day, we want no more than four hours of awake time before going to bed. So ideally at this age, we’re getting at least two hours,

if not two and a half hours of daytime sleep. So let’s say 1230 to 3:00 PM. And then a four week window before bed, which means a 7:00 PM bedtime. And when I say 7:00 PM, I mean asleep for the night by then, hopefully that helps. All right, next question from Shane. Shane says my almost nine-month-old baby sleeps through the night from 7:00 PM,

but wakes up at 5:00 AM or earlier I started using the method to let her stay in the crib till the expected wake time of six 30. She cries on and off during the one and a half hours, it’s been three days and nothing has improved. Wondering if I did something wrong also how to plan the first nap. Should I decrease the week window by 1.1

0.5 hours to start the first nap shade. This is a really good question. My question back to you and you don’t have to answer me in the comments, but I’m wondering if this is a nine month old, that just went down to two naps a day. And if it is a nine-month old, that just went down to two naps a day.

This is your answer for the early wakings. We’ve done the Nat transition too soon. So I always, always, always tell my clients that I know some of you who’ve joined me before. You know what I say about nap, transitions, delay, delay, delay, the laying the longer that you can delay nap transitions, the better the nap transition will go.

I promise you. I know sometimes we’re so eager to get that nap transition to happen, but the longer we wait the better. So first I would say, is your baby on a three nap schedule because that will be needed to correct the early waking number one, number two, that’s a pro that’s the prevention piece. So we really need to be thinking about prevention.

The management piece is the one you’re talking about. I leave her until six 30. That’s fine. We can use that approach to manage the issue in the moment, but we really need to make sure we’re figuring out the core reason for that early waking and preventing it from happening in the first place. Otherwise, we’re just kind of continuing to get this crying in the morning and just sort dealing with it.

Behaviourally rather than from a biology of seek perspective. Hopefully that makes sense with the biology of seek perspective and answering your questions. How do we plan the first nap? We always, always always plan the first nap based on an ideal morning, wake up time of no earlier than six 30. So nine months old on a three nap schedule that first week window would be two hours and 45 minutes.

And so we would never have that first snap happening before nine 15. All right. So we make sure that we keep that nice and steady so that we’re not actually inadvertently reinforcing the early waking by starting the first nap too soon. So to answer your question, no, we would absolutely not decrease the wake window by an hour and a half, because then what we’re doing is we’re starting the day too early and it’s just perpetuating your issues over and over again.

How do we perpetuate that issue over and over again? Number one, the first nap feels to baby as though it’s an extension of nighttime sleep. It’s not a distinct sleep period. And so there’s no sort of impetus, biologic, biologically sleep speaking to improve that early morning waking that’s number one. Secondly, a lot of times what happens is we’re left with this last app ending too early.

And so we’re left with two, not so great options. Number one, I’m going to use a very early bedtime, which we should be using when needed judiciously. However, it’s not ideal or the other option is do I stretch them to a leader bedtime, but now you’ve got a massive week window and a baby who’s overtired. And now you’ve just perpetuated that cycle over and over again.

So there could be lots of other things related to this early waking to me at this age, it’s normally about the nap schedule, but the daytime sleep schedule being inappropriate and the homeostatic sleep pressure, the drive to sleep overnight, being inappropriate, which is then leading to these kinds of ingrained early weightings. Hopefully that helps. Okay. Jessica, you asked,

struggling with my baby getting down to sleep on her back. Been trying bio Gaia to help with acid. How can I get my two and a half month old to sleep and recruitment bassinet? Great question, Jessica. This is my specialty. I work with little ins at this age all the time who are seemingly Ruth using the bassinet or the crib. There’s lots that goes into this.

I mean, I take, you know, parents through a whole program of how to do exactly what you’re asking me, but I will give you some key things to keep in mind. Number one, if she has truly been diagnosed with reflex, there may be a case for giving her medication, because if she’s in pain and discomfort, little ones who are in pain and discomfort will not improve their sleep.

Okay. So you have to address the pain and discomfort. First and foremost, that would be for me, my homework for you would be addressed the pain and discomfort right now, before we do anything else. So talk to your doctor about how you can do that. Number one, secondly, in terms of getting a little one to be settled on the back in their bassinet or crib,

we want to warm up the bassinet or crib 15 minutes before we put them down. So you use a heating pad or some other heating source sleep with the Crip sheets. So they smell like you or put in like a stinky shirt that you’ve been wearing all day. Sounds kind of gross, but it works in with the heating source for about 15 minutes before you put her down.

And then beyond that, it’s about the four keys to great sleep. So perfectly sleep conducive environment, a hundred percent pitch black, cool enough continuous noise playing on age appropriate sleep schedule you’re following week, but it is you’re making sure she’s not tired. You’re getting the knocks in. However you can in the day safely popping her into your carrier, going for a stroller,

walk, letting her cuddle and sleep on you. Not worrying about the creeper bassinet during the day to get her good sleep in the day. So you can improve nighttime as soon as possible routine, having a consistent routine. Even at this age, 20 minutes before bed, same activities in the same order, inside the perfectly safe conducive environment, very dimly lit noise,

running every single activity in the same order every night. And then beyond that, it’s about sleep independence. So repeating, repeating the steps that you need to take to continue to get her down every time you’ve practiced, even if she pops back a week cries and you have to pick her up again, it’s like putting a little bit of money into a bank account.

It will save up eventually for the big payoff of getting her to settle on her back. It’s a lot of work in the beginning. And then the other part of this in terms of independence is decreasing her reliance gradually on whatever she’s currently needing really needing to get her to sleep so that we’re decreasing the amount of seed work, shifting the sleep, work onto her so that she’s falling asleep independently.

So for example, and I’ve talked to some of you about this before. If you’ve joined me before an independency progression that you can follow, that’s what I call it. An independency progression is for example, let’s say we’re vigorously bouncing on an exercise ball right now to get her to sleep. And often refluxy colicky babies. I had one myself, which is why I deal with them all the time in my work.

Often they need a ton of movement. We want to gradually reduce that movement over time until we’re eventually just holding baby to sleep without movement. So all of what I said, like I said, I usually do this with my newborn clients as part of a bigger program. So there’s a lot to cover in just a short time with you, but all of that needs to work together holistically to get her to sleep independently on her,

back in her crib or bassinet, which is absolutely the safest place for her right now. But like I said before, if we’re hinting or sort of, we have a hint of pain and discomfort that needs to be addressed first at this age, before we can work on all of that. All right. Hopefully that helps. And I sympathize, it’s hard at this age,

but you will get there. You will absolutely get there. Okay. Next question is from joyous. He said, hi, Roseli thanks for this session. It’s my pleasure. I love doing this. I’m here with you today. I’m wearing my festive Halloween sweater. We love Halloween in this house and I love answering your questions. Okay. Joyce says I have a 21 month old.

Who’s generally happy taking two 60 minute naps during the day and sleeps 10 to 11 hours at night. Two questions. Number one, should I proactively transition her to one nap as I’m starting to get weird looks and comments that a 21 month olds should not be on two naps. Number two, we sometimes get early wake-ups 5:45 AM and we never surpass 11 hours of night’s sleep.

Are these signals to transition to one nap. Thank you, Joyce. I love that you asked this question because first and foremost, let’s just lock out the noise of other people, commenting on how our babies and children’s sleep, please. All right. If it works for us, don’t fix, what’s not broken. I can tell you that Dr. Dina’s kids kept two naps a day at two years old plus.

So you were definitely not weird. And when I read, I, I almost wanted to shout when I read that you are still having your little one, take two naps per day. I was going, yes, I’m so happy that you’re doing that because what that’s doing even at 21 months old, because it’s clearly working for your little one is it’s keeping cortisol levels at bay.

This little one is rested through the whole day. We’re having conservative week windows. It’s like my it’s my dream to see this situation joyous. So no, you don’t need to proactively transition her to one that block out all the opinions know that you’re doing the right thing. And really if it’s working for you again, nothing to fix, if it’s working for you,

your question about the early wake-ups, you know, could it be a signal that this schedule is starting to become inappropriate for you? A little one potentially, but it really depends on what happens with the early wake-up. Is she upset at 5 45 or is she content? So normally if we’re getting really upset response in the morning, that points back to something in the daytime sleep schedule,

but even then I wouldn’t necessarily transition to one nap a day. I might maybe cut the first app down to 45 minutes. See if that helps go to 2 45 minute nap, see if that helps or address it more behaviorally in the morning or through sleep hygiene. So making sure it’s truly a hundred percent pitch black, there’s nothing bothering her in the morning.

Like the heat coming on. Hopefully not at this time, but you never know, depending on where you are in the world, something like that before I would say we got to move to a one nap schedule. And then on the other hand, if she’s content in the early morning, that’s wonderful. That’s just extra independent rest time for her. And I wouldn’t sort of,

you know, try to fix it again. If the two naps are working for you and you’ve got an early waking that sort of more content, I wouldn’t even think of it as a concern. It’s just extra independent rest time, always wait until six 30 to get her, of course, but no, not necessarily a signal that you need to transition to one nap specifically.

If you’re still getting both naps and you’re getting a great night’s sleep. Okay. Hopefully that helps good job keeping those two naps per day. All right, Phillip, you said our two-year-old continues to wake up once to three times per night. So Phillip, you didn’t ask me a question here, but you know, in terms of two-year-olds continuing to wake up lots of times per night,

mostly this is behavioral at this age. So meaning that I needed something specific at bedtime to fall asleep. And so I’m going to need that thing repeated over and over again overnight. So remember the way we fall asleep is the way we expect to return to sleep overnight. So it may be that you need to focus on independent seed skills at bedtime in order to improve the overnight wakings.

And I’m not even going to say, maybe it’s very likely that that is the case other than if you’ve got a fully independent Seper at night and perhaps they’re going through nightmares or night terrors, how do we know their nightmares or night terrors? First and foremost is little one falling asleep independently at night, if they are, and they’re still getting those issues overnight,

it could be nightmares or night terrors. Those two things are distinct by the way, night terrors or confusional events. There are sort of arousal, mid arousal events overnight, and they are mostly due to going down over tired, having screens too close to bedtime, watching scary things, being exposed to anxiety or stress during the day that it hasn’t been addressed or being too hot overnight or potentially a full bladder.

So lots of different things to explore there. All right. When do you say hi, baby is turning one. Is it appropriate to switch to time of day nap schedule? How exactly does that work when using crib or do you start, do you count the start of the next week window from the end of the hour or time of waking? Good question,

Wendy. So in terms of time of day nap schedule, I’m assuming you mean like a set schedule. So there are little ones where you can switch them to a set schedule at this age, they’re being very consistent on their two nap schedules. So for example, lots of kiddos at this age might be on a 10 to 11, three to four nap schedule with an APM bedtime.

If your little one has that kind of consistency, that level of consistency go for a set schedule, no problem at all. And that just means you’re not really adjusting the next sleep period based on the previous sleep periods. So you’re not adjusting, let’s say bedtime based on when little one woke up from second nap, which is absolutely what you should do in their first year of life before they’re more consistent on a two nap schedule.

And then your question about crib hour, you would start your next week window for what, from when BD actually woke up. All right. Now, in your case, though, if you’re using per hour on a set schedule, you wouldn’t base that off of when they woke up. However, I don’t know if you’re asking about the same baby or a different baby.

If your little one is still not doing solid 60 minute naps, it’s not the time for a set schedule. So maybe that answered your first question as well. All right, next question. Alison, you said question about newborn sneak foundations by little IST is seven weeks and is doing great with sleeping in her bassinet and all the safe sleep stuff and starting to sleep longer stretches overnight,

but she has moderate reflex. And one of the strategies that helps is holding her upright for at least 30 minutes after eating with her short week windows. This means I’m still holding her when it’s time for her naps. So she falls asleep, upgrade in my arms for all sleep and is always fully asleep. When I transfer her to the bassinet, I know the reflex will resolve a time,

but just curious what we can do in the newborn stage to set a good seat foundation, given that she’s needing to be held to sleep at this time. Really good question, Alison, I’m so happy to hear you’ve prioritize safe sleep and she’s sleeping in her bassinet, such a dream for me to hear wonderful, especially with reflux. Now, hopefully like I said before,

hopefully the reflux is being addressed medically from a healthcare perspective that she’s being followed and that this will resolve and it will resolve as soon as possible. Excuse me, your circumstances are extremely common. As you can imagine with the little one with reflex and you can absolutely still improve independence in this situation. The best thing to do is to start to feed immediately upon waking from naps.

So you’re immediately waking her upon waking from that, or sorry, feeding her upon, waking from naps and then holding her. So then hopefully you’ve got some amount of time between the end of holding her to the end of her week window. Right now that time might be really short still, but any amount to do some tummy time to do some mat time,

to do some very small play time, minor, minor play time is better than nothing. And then as her week, window does increase that time is going to get longer and longer. So the answer is to feed upon waking. And this is actually better for reflux CPDs anyway, that it’s not so close to sleep and folding after. And then the other thing that you can try to experiment with is 20 minutes of holding after eating most refluxy babies,

20 minutes, we’ll do it for them as long as you give them a good burping session and perhaps a bicycle leaks massage at the same time. All right, hopefully that helps. Okay. Daniela, you said my five-year-old daughter wakes up in the middle of the night to find me will only sleep with me, laying with her. So Daniela, this is the same answer as I would give for 2, 3, 4 year old that is doing this as well.

So we have to go back to how does this little one fall asleep at bedtime? If they fall asleep, laying with you, they’re much more likely to want to do the same thing overnight. And in fact, it’s not fair to not lay with them overnight, if that’s what we’ve done at bedtime, because this is how we’ve taught them to sleep.

We’ve taught them that they need us to lay with them at bedtime in order for them to sleep. So of course, that is now ingrained that I need that to fall back asleep. When I stir through that late of sleep, that’s what I need to do. If you want to change this situation, we have to start at that time first and then take your bed completely off the table as an option.

It’s amazing what kind of progress you can have when you take the option, you don’t want off the table. You don’t want her to sleep with you. We take the bed completely off the table as an option. Sometimes we put like stacks of towels and laundry. I know this sounds ridiculous, but it can work, put things on the bed that just make no room for her.

So that it’s super clear in the middle of the night, when you’re sleep deprived, that is not a place for her to sleep. It’s not the place you want her to sleep because this is what happens with habits, right, is with little ones. They’re very, you know, the, they learn habits quite quickly and they become ingrained quite quickly.

So whatever we teach them to do, they’re going to continue to do so. It has to start from bedtime, Daniela, and then you have to be consistent with that overnight. That’s the only way there’s no magic wand. It’s hard work. You have to be consistent, create clear rules around sleep. Mommy’s not going to leave with you at bedtime,

but I’ll come check on you. You know, you can listen to toddler meditations at this age that can sometimes help to distract them. So they’re listening to something that’s quite entertaining and distracting and focusing their attention and sticking with it. So it could be a few hard nights, but consistency is really, what’s going to get you through. I always say to people,

you don’t have to, it doesn’t have to be this hard. I promise you. It’s just a few nights of really sticking to the rules, creating clear rules and boundaries, holding the boundary, but also holding space for her response because she’s allowed to be upset about that, right? We’re not going to force her to not be upset. And we’re just going to say,

it’s okay. It’s okay to be upset about it, but this is what we’re doing. These are the rules. You set the boundaries, I’m holding the boundary and I’m staying consistent. And often little ones actually feel safer and more secure when they really understand from you that this is the rule and that they’re going to be consistent about it. Hopefully that helps.

Okay, next question. Naomi, you said six months old, exclusively breastfeeding. How do I know if I need to feed him at night? Still, he will wake up once or twice and I feed for maybe five minutes. He sleeps well for naps and goes to bed nicely too. This is a great question, Naomi. So how do we understand whether a little one at this age needs to eat or not first and foremost,

I want to say something. I say to all my clients, patients over at king crew, whoever I’m talking to you, that hunger has nothing to do with sleep skills. So if a little one has solid independent steam skills and they’re still waking up overnight hungry for a feed that’s hunger, right? Nothing to do with their sleep skills. Doesn’t kind of mean that we failed in terms of their sleep skills or somehow they’re not doing well in terms of their seat skills.

It’s just hunger. So how do we know if it’s hunger? I wake up, I take a full feed. So I don’t know what five, five minutes of feed reflects what your little one is also doing in the day. If it does reflect approximately what’s, he’s doing what he’s doing in the day, he’s hungry. He takes a full feed,

full feed, whatever that means for him. He goes right back to sleep. Okay. If that’s the case, that’s hunger. What does it look like? If it’s not hunger, I wake up, I nibbled to get myself back to sleep, or I’m really upset about going back to sleep. I’m not really taking a full fee. That’s not hunger.

All right. So hopefully that helps. I will tell you six months old, exclusively breastfed baby, depending on where you are at in the solids journey, iron stores almost completely, if not, almost if not fully, completely depleted from what they got in the womb. If you haven’t focused on iron rich solids, and sometimes even if you have, but you’re still building up solids,

we could have a very hungry baby overnight. There’s some of my clients who have super independent superstar sleepers at this age, but still feeding one to three times overnight. So it could be completely normal and completely within the realm of reasonable to expect that he would be hungry at this age. Hopefully that helps. All right, next question. Elisa, six months old next week,

great napper and night sleeper, but seems to not be able to sleep beyond 5:00 AM. She goes down six 30 to 7:00 PM. We give her her dream feed around 10:00 PM. Then she’s awake around four 30 to five sometimes gets back to sleep, but is rare. All right. So at least there could be a couple of things happening here. Number one is that this could point back to the daytime sleep schedule being inappropriate.

So make sure she’s on three naps per day, by the way, for everybody here, if you haven’t yet downloaded the better sleep bundle on the parent’s playbook website, I absolutely would do that. Parent playbook dot C O. It’s a great accompaniment to these sessions because you’re going to see all my recommended week windows, all my recommended sample sleep schedules. And you’re going to see the schedule that I’m recommending right now,

which is the six month three nap schedule. So if we’re using those age appropriate week windows two and a half hours before nap, one, two and a half hours before and up to two and a quarter hours before not three and no more than two hours before bedtime, this is called a cascading schedule and it might be very different than the ones that you Googled in the middle of the night,

where we’ve gotten longer wake windows in the morning because I fall asleep science. So we want to increase homeostatic, sleep pressure in the morning. And before the middle of the day nap to increase the length of the nap to consolidate the nap and then compensate for that by tapering off on the sleep pressure as we get to bedtime to avoid an overtired baby. So,

number one, we should be following that. If we’re not, if we, for example, are skipping third naps a lot, or having a massive week window before bed or doing something other than what I just said, you could be getting those early wakings. The other thing that could be happening is that she is hungry at this time. So you could consider adding a dream feed at 3:00 AM.

So yes, I’m starting set an alarm and feeding her at 3:00 AM. Just as you are at 10:00 PM, both of those things could bind should solve this issue. If it’s not solving the issue might be something else related to sleep hygiene, like being a hut, needing to be a hundred percent awake before she goes to bed, perhaps that’s not happening. She needs to be a hundred percent away through her routine.

And when she goes down and she also needs to be getting herself to sleep independently, she needs to be in a hundred percent pitch black room, cool enough continuous noise, all the rest of that sleep hygiene, consistent routine before bedtime, there could be something in there that could be going on as well. But usually those two things I talked about will fix that issue.

Just going to take a sip of water. Okay, Laura, you said your question is 16 months old on one nap, but often getting five 30 wake ups, even with a six 30 bedtime. Any suggestions, mostly at 16 months old with early wakings, especially if they’re very upset early wakings. We correct this by going back onto a two nap schedule.

So we go back onto a set 10 to 11, three to four with an 8:00 PM bedtime set schedule, making sure the first step is no longer than an hour. And the second nap is based on four hours of awake time. If that still doesn’t help you nap a nail. If the second nap cut the first nap down to 45 minutes, use a four and a quarter hour a week window,

get those two naps happening on a consistent basis. You should see this correct itself. And then once you get, you know, maybe three to four weeks from now, it’s been corrected. You’re not reinforcing the early wake up in any way. For example saying, oh, it’s five 30. Let’s get up for the day. I’m going to give you food.

And I’ve talked to you to expose you to light, which is all very reinforcing on those. You’re not reinforcing the early waking. It will correct itself on a two nap schedule at this age. And then after about three to four weeks of that becoming stable. And especially if little one starts to fight the second nap, regardless of the schedule I just gave you,

then it’s time to go back onto the one that schedule. So we correct, or the wakings a lot at this age because of a one nap schedule happening a little bit too early on their developmental spectrum. So basically this little one is not yet ready for a one that schedule that often manifests in early wakings. I can’t tell you how many parents of 19 to 21 month olds.

I get calling me up saying, RoseLee, I’m getting these crazy 5:00 AM. Wake up sometimes four 30 wake ups. And when we dig into the sleep history, we see that the one nap schedule was implemented too early, before little one was developmentally ready for it. All right, hopefully that helps. Next question, Janell, you said hi wisely. My son is almost 18 months.

He no longer takes two naps, but will sleep around one 30 for about an hour or so. He keeps waking up throughout the night and will scream for hours. We try the five minute, 10 minute, minute method of going in and then putting him down. My husband did that until it was over an hour and he wouldn’t sleep unless I come in and give him boo.

All right. So Chanel, your 18 month old son, it may be completely appropriate at 18 months to be on one, not per day at this point, as long as he’s capable of sleeping at least two hours, because he’s only sleeping an hour, but one nap schedule would not be appropriate for him. That is way too much awake time for him in the day.

He’s going down at the end of the day with stress on his brain. So cortisol buildup, and it’s not going to allow him to sleep through the night. The other thing we want to make sure is that he’s going down independently from bedtime. So I don’t know if you’re trying this method in the middle of the night, but still helping him to sleep at bedtime.

In that case, this method is going to be completely few child. It’s not going to work. It has to start at bedtime. The example is set at bedtime. The other thing is, if you sort of try something and then just eventually give him boob. Now, all we’ve done is taught him to cry, which we don’t want to do.

This is extremely confusing and inconsistent. So this is why I always say you have to choose a method that you’re 100% comfortable with because if your little one, if you’re not comfortable, a hundred percent with implementing that method to its completion, with a hundred percent consistency, it’s not going to work because you’re going to be inconsistent. You’re going to be confusing.

You’re going to introduce intermittent reinforcement, which is essentially teaching a little once you cry. So this method may not be appropriate for you. You might have to find something else that you can stick to, but whatever you find that you can stick to, you have to see it fully through. It’s not fair to sort of say, I’m just going to try something and then eventually give a boob.

Because now we’ve just, we’ve literally just taught him to cry for a feat to cry for boot, which we don’t want to do. And I know you don’t want to do, but go back to this idea of two nicely placed naps in the day. Again, we can go back to that 10 to 11, three to four set schedule with an 8:00 PM bedtime or cutting that first step down a little bit shorter increase in the wake window a little bit more to get a three 15 nap to 45 minute apps are going to serve you much better than a one hour nap in the middle of your day.

You’re going to get conservative week windows balanced rest across the day, lowered sleep cortisol levels by the end of the day. Okay. Hopefully that helps. Kamilah your question is, Hey, okay. So two year old goes to bed 7, 7 30 weeks around 7:00 AM trying to get them to not from 1, 1 30 to two 30, depending on wake time. He’s just screaming for an hour for the past week and a half.

What am I doing wrong? So Pamela, there could be so many things going on here and I have to ask you more questions to sort of get down to the bottom of it. However, at two years old, there is an extremely common to your sleep regression that is so behavioral. It is so rooted in behavior that it sort of, isn’t something that can be fully solved by sleep science by kind of moving around naps and things like that.

So this is more than likely just resistance. If you’ve noticed him, for example, stringing longer sentences together or being more resistant to different things during the day saying no pushing back then, he’s probably just doing that at bedtime as well, or nap time as well. I should say, in terms of nap time, it really is just being consistent and pushing through.

So it’s saying I’m carving out this time for nap every single day, regardless, you can’t control how he responds or how he reacts. We can only control what you do. So you control as much as you can control. You’ve got your perfectly sleep conducive environment that you can control your consistent routine, your nap schedule. You could try to move the nap a bit later just to see if you can gear up a little bit more sleep pressure to see if that will help him to fall asleep.

It may or may not work because like I said, this is really behavioral. So you could even aim for 2:00 PM nap just to see how that goes. You can also, you know, let him know that it’s okay. If he doesn’t sleep, you can just rest. Sometimes just taking that pressure off, even with a two year old, even with a fresh two-year-old sometimes taking that pressure off and saying,

you don’t have to sleep. You just need to rest can sometimes help. And the other thing that can help is to add time onto your prenup routine. So an additional five to 15 minutes of extra cuddling with you inside the prepared environment, really dimly-lit noise machine running, making sure he’s got two sessions of 20 to 30 minutes of vigorous physical activity, heart thumping,

sweaty activity, ideally outdoors twice per day is also very important. There’s lots of things we need to look at here. But like I said, at this age, it’s mostly behavioral. So being clear about the rules around napping and being consistent, and it will come back. I promise it will come back either as a nap or at least as rest time,

if he doesn’t sleep at all for his nap, remember that time should be earlier. So we usually 6:30 PM for the night so that you’re trying to achieve all of the 24 hour sleep totals overnight now by compensating for that loss snap, hopefully that helps. Okay. So now you said one year old wakes up between four 30 to five every day. He has not slept past five.

Most of his life he’s sleep train goes to bed around six 30 to seven, still on two naps. So Danielle and so happy to hear he’s still on two naps because you knew I was probably going to say, Hey, if this little one is waking up early, it could have been a, an early nap transition. So glad to hear he’s on naps.

My next question on a tune-up schedule at this age would be is he getting too much sleep in the day? So if those two naps are longer than about an hour each, and you’re getting a four 30 to 5:00 AM wake up, it could be that those naps need to be cut down to no more than an hour each to build more seat pressure. The other thing is what time is second nap ending?

Because on a two next schedule at this age, six 30 to 7:00 PM is usually too early of a bedtime to expect a later morning wake-up time. So often at this age, we’re looking more at seven 30 to 8:00 PM bedtimes on a two nap schedule. So is that last week window, at least three and a half hour, three and a half to four hours.

That would be the next thing I would think about. And then the rest of it would be about your hygiene. Do you have a consistent bedtime routine? Do you have a perfectly sleep conducive environment? Is it a hundred percent pitch black in the morning and all of the rest of it? And also are you reinforcing the early wakings? Remember we want to avoid food light and conversation until at least six 30 in the morning.

If we’re doing things that reward the behavior of waking up early, we’re just going to have to expect those wakings to continue to happen over and over again. So avoid irresistible rewards in the morning. All right, next question, Shannon. You said if baby doesn’t fall asleep on their own at night or for naps, do we let them cry it out until they fall asleep or what to do to get them to fall asleep independently?

Shannon, this is a big question. There’s basically hundreds of ways to get your little one to fall asleep independently. You don’t have to use anything that you feel uncomfortable with. There is never this sort of binary decision of, I have to keep doing this thing that is making us all sleep deprived, or I have to do this thing that I think I’m really uncomfortable with.

And it’s my only choice. There’s literally hundreds of ways. So when I work with my clients, my patients at kid crew, anybody that I’m talking to to establish independent sleep, I always say we work along a spectrum, right? So on one end of the spectrum are parents who say, Rosalie, I need sleep yesterday. I want Results in like a week or less.

And I know I’m going to need to deal with tears. Obviously I don’t want to, but if that is something that I need to deal with to get results quickly, I’m okay with that. Then I work with parents all on the other side of the spectrum, which is why I personally have longer-term private support packages like three months, for example, who savors the,

I don’t care if it takes us two to three months, I want to be really supportive and gentle and hands on. And I want to do things step by step and gradually because I really want to minimize tears or at least increase my involvement in tears and frustration. And then I have parents sort of all in the middle of that spectrum. So there’s so many different ways of doing this and the way that you need to think about it is where are we at now in terms of getting them to sleep and how do I get them to sleep independently?

Do I want to take things more gradually in that case, we might want to decrease slowly, slowly, slowly decrease the help that we’re giving them to fall asleep until we’re getting to the point where we’re putting baby down awake, walking way, they’re happy, confident to fall asleep on their own, or am I okay with a few more tears initially, because I know it’s going to be a shorter process.

So in that case, do I put baby a week from the very first night and then choose one consistent result a response. So that could mean kid coming in and out to the room to user voice that could mean stained by the crib the whole time and providing some support that could mean picking baby up, putting that back down. But the main principle is if you’re choosing more of a traditional sleep training approach where we’re putting baby down a week from the very first night that we are always returning baby awake into the crib,

rather than helping them to fall asleep. And that’s how we’re going to get Results. By the way, whether you choose something that is more on this end of the spectrum or this end of the spectrum, most important thing is that we’re progressing forward. So you don’t want to get stuck at any one step. If you’re kind of being more gentle at first,

we still need to move away from providing so much support and intervention over time. So we don’t get a hard regression. That’s one of the drawbacks of some of the more gentle approaches. Although when you work with me, I help you through that. One of the drawbacks is that we can get hard regressions if we get stuck at any one step for too long.

So there are so many different ways to achieve this, but remember as well that before we get to the point of getting a little one to fall asleep independently, we have to make sure those other key foundations of sleeper covered off. I’m using a perfectly safe conducive environment. I’m using an age appropriate sleep schedule. I’m music, consistent bedtime routine, because if we don’t have those in place,

we tend to have more crying and more upset. And it takes us longer to establish independence. Whenever I hear people saying, oh, I’ve tried sleep training. And baby just keeps crying and crying and crying. I’m always thinking something wasn’t right there. The daytime sleep schedule likely wasn’t appropriate, or you were trying to do nights and naps at the same time,

which I don’t recommend because that just completely overtired baby. I always recommend working on nights first, holding naps constant for awhile. Then once nighttime is going well, then we can return to the idea of independent napping. Hopefully that helps. I’m just going to take a sip of water. Okay. Next question is from Angela. She said, my three-year-old just decided to stop napping three weeks ago.

She refuses naps and quiet time. She also won’t go to sleep at seven to 7:30 PM, easily and wakes at night or at 5:00 AM now, but she used to sleep eight 30 to six 30 with a nap, 12 to one 30. How do I get her to sleep? 11 to 12 hours again through the night getting exhausted. Angela. Good question.

So first and foremost, getting her to sleep at 7, 7 30 is likely way too late for her. She is extremely overtired at this point, especially with an early waking. I would aim for her to be asleep by 6:00 PM for the night full stop. If that doesn’t work for you or you’re still getting the same result or some something else is not working with that,

then what I would recommend is pushing her nap later. So getting a 2:00 PM nap, two to 3:00 PM nap, she’s quite, she’s quite a lot more mature than she was when she was able to take a nap at 12:00 PM before. So her sleep pressure is just not high enough at 12, even with an early waking. So try a 2:00 PM nap that could help that could work.

And in that case, then you might be able to maintain an eight 30 bedtime might be a little bit later, might be nine, but it should help to resolve the early wakings. On the other hand, though, if that doesn’t work again, it’s back to an earlier bedtime, seven to seven 30 for three-year-olds who’s just dropped their naps is too late.

Unfortunately they’ve already got cortisol. They’ve already got stress on the brain. So work backwards to make sure that we’ve got relaxing activities happening before that early bedtime. Even if you could only get to six 30, but six o’clock likely in this case is better. All right. Hopefully that helps. Okay. Visha I hope I’m saying that right. What if the baby baby’s dotted independency,

is there a way to get him to wake up later? My 10 month old is currently waking up between five and 6:00 AM he’s to nap. He’s got two naps, about three and a half hours from when he wakes up. He sometimes speaks for 30 to 45 minutes and sometimes I’m able to extend the nap to one and a half hours. However I’m able,

never able to extend both naps. He’s then tired early and we start getting ready for sleep around 5, 5 30 and his feet by six. He nurses to speak for both apps and in the evening. So Visha getting him to be independent at bedtime is actually one of the keys to improve the early morning waking. So it’s what I’m saying is it may be difficult to improve the early waking if he’s not falling a seat from awake independently at bedtime on a consistent basis.

So I would highly recommend that you work on independent sleep and I believe you are part of the parent playbook membership. So you’ve got all of my sleep coaching methods inside the membership that you can look at. You could go pick a method and you can ask me inside our private group for more help with implementing the method for your specific circumstances. So definitely I would recommend that number one.

Secondly, it sounds like his first nap, maybe starting too early, if you’re basing it off his actual morning, week of time. So with early wakings, we want to make sure that we’re setting the first snap off on the right foot. And it’s got to be based on our ideal morning wake-up time of no earlier than six 30 at 10 months old.

That means that the first app is no earlier than nine 30. I’m suspecting it could wrong that his first nap is earlier than that. Okay. So we’re going to distract him, entertain him, get him to that first nap. Start time of nine 30, as much as we can to try to resolve the early waking, but really to answer your question,

we do need to work on independence. Otherwise it’s very difficult for him to move through those early morning cycles, which are extremely light for a lot of little ones. The skills, the skills to get through the early morning period are the last set of skills to fall into place. Meaning I first need to know how to fall asleep on my own at bedtime,

how to fall back to sleep without throughout the night, how to sleep independently for naps, and then I’ll be able to nail those early morning wakings. All right, hopefully that helps. Naomi said how Naomi, you said, how long should six month old naps during the day be how many naps at six months old? I highly recommend a three nap schedule on week windows of two and a half before nap,

one, two and a half before nap to two and a quarter before nap three and two hours before bed. And in terms of how long those naps should be, we’re looking for, well, at least an hour for the first two naps. If you can get them to be closer to an hour and 15 to hour and a half, that would be great.

And then the final not being a cat nap of 30 minutes or so. Okay. Question from Shane nine month old baby still has contact apps and I have to lie down with her on our bed, but she sleeps independently through the night in the crib, how to train her to nap longer and up independently in her crib. I used cried out method for night’s sleep training.

So first and foremost, Shane, I want to say to you and to everyone else, when you say that you use the cried out method, you might be surprised to know that it’s not something that like for example, a sleep consultant learns what the cried out method is. It’s actually sort of a blanket term. So when you say cried out, I don’t actually know what you need.

The closest sort of cousin to what I think sometimes people mean by crying out is the extinction method, which means I put baby down awake at bedtime. I leave the room and I don’t return overnight. So I don’t necessarily need to know exactly what you mean for this question to answer this question. But just so everybody knows when we use this term, it’s more of like a term,

not a specific method that’s being referred to. And I could ask 10 different people what they mean by I’m using cried out and it could be 10 different methods. So just so you know, it’s kind of an interesting thing for me to hear. So to answer your question, the great thing is you’ve already got your little one sleeping independently through the night,

which is excellent. That is the first thing that we need to have in place before we can think about establishing independence for naps. Next thing I work on one nap at a time work on nap. One first nap, one holds your best chance of success. It’s got the highest homeostatic sleep pressure, highest drive to sleep before it. So we usually have success faster and sooner.

Yes, a baby does not get confused if we ask them to be independent for nap one and not for the rest of the maps of the day. Great next in terms of getting her to nap independently, not treating can feel much harder than nighttime training. So you got to kind of go into it. Knowing it’s going to take longer for some little ones.

It’s going to feel harder. Number one, you need to make sure that you’ve got a hundred percent pitch-black room that is extremely important for naps in her own crib independently, and for longer naps, 100% pitch black room continuous noise. Cool enough room, consistent prenup routine five to 10 minutes beforehand in the prepared environment. A hundred percent pitch black, a little bit of dim light and going noise machine breading,

same activities you do every day before that. Now put her down awake and use exactly the same method that you used at nighttime. All right. In the case of that. So we try only for 45 to 60 minutes. All right. After this 45 to 60 minutes are up. If she hasn’t slept, you get her up, you take a 20 to 30 minute break.

Please try again for another cycle of 45 to 60 minutes, the majority of babies will fall asleep in that second cycle. As you can imagine, your whole day gets wonky like this. That’s why I say work on one nap at a time, it will happen. It will work. You just have to be consistent and have to realize it is harder to do the daytime than the nighttime.

So that’s why you need that a hundred percent pitch black room. You need to be really on top of sleep hygiene because are so far fewer environmental signals. It’s time to sleep in the day. So it’s harder for them to transition from being awake to being asleep. Hopefully that helps Jean. Angela, what do I do with this fall time change coming up?

Yes. All right. So I have a blog on this, on my website, baby sleep club.com. If you wanted to check it out, it’s it should be the top blog right away on that page, but there’s a few different things that you can do to prepare for the fall time change. A lot of people, I would say the majority of parents usually choose to go with the flow.

So what is go with the flow on the first day of the time change, if your baby was previously waking at six 30 in the morning, that’s going to become five 30 with the fallback. You just let them get up at that time. But now you base everything on the new time. So your first half of the day is going to be based on your ideal morning wake-up time of no earlier than six 30.

So that means that baby’s going to be awake for an hour longer than usual before their first app. That’s okay. They’re going to be cranky, just distract them, expose them to lots of natural light, get them to that time and then carry on with your day with the rest of your regular week windows. That’s the really the easiest, best thing to do.

Usually for a couple of days, you’ve got extra crankiness happening. That’s okay. Other parents, a smaller proportion, but other parents like to prepare ahead of time, if you’re kind of more like, you know, a little bit more planning as apparently more type a, you couldn’t do this. And what you would do is you would extend, so you would make the first nap starting for the first nap later by five to 10 minutes every day or every other day,

leading up to the time change. So that you’re kind of shifting your entire day later so that when you get to the day of the time change, you’re now on that clock. Okay. So you have to kind of time that out. See how much time you have ahead of the time change to do that. And then if let’s say you’ve got a little one who’s waking up way too late in the morning and going to bed too late,

just do nothing. And you’ll naturally be on a shifted schedule. That’s one hour earlier bonus for those of you who are dealing with those issues, hopefully that helps. But I do have a, a blog on my website that goes into that in more detail, Katrina. Okay, sorry. Before I address Katrina’s question, I have noticed I have a lot more questions that I’m not going to be able to get to because we’ve only got six minutes left.

So I will try to do my best, but I just want to say thank you for all the questions. They’re amazing. And I love doing this Katrina. Your question is any tips for our almost seven month old to sleep independently. He’s an active one, a flipper, and starting to crawl. He can cry for almost two hours. And if we pick up putting him back,

makes him more agitated. All right. So Katrina number one for getting a little one to sleep independently, good sleep hygiene. I can’t stress this enough. It really isn’t about the method we choose because really the independency almost falls into place when we’ve got sleep hygiene, working for us. So perfectly secretly sort of environment, a hundred percent pitch, black blue,

and that through continuous noise, consistent bedtime routine age, appropriate sleep schedule at seven months old, we want a three nap schedule on wake windows of two and a half to two hours and 45 minutes. All right. So once you’ve got that in place, let him crawl and let him flip around. Give him tons of mat time during the day outside of CP time,

help him for his naps to nail that three nap schedule, excuse me, anything that you can do safely to get him to sleep in the day on those three, naps is amazing and then focus on nighttime sleep in terms of him crying for two hours. Again, that points back to something is inappropriate in the healthy sleep hygiene. There’s something going on in the daytime sleep schedule might not be appropriate.

Maybe he’s on two naps too early. Maybe he’s wake window before bedtime is too long. And then the last thing is if picking him up is making him more agitated than the method may be inappropriate as well. So at this age, we might not want to be picking up anymore, especially if we’re getting more agitated. Sometimes we can sort of be prolonging the crying over a longer period of time because we’re trying to be more supportive,

but by intervening more, we’re actually prolonging the process of getting to that success. So this may mean that your method is inappropriate as well. All right, hopefully that helps Shannon. You said four months old. How many naps for how long each four month olds that I work with are on four to five naps per day. Getting ready for a three nap transition at five and a half months old,

but not yet ready age appropriate week. Windows are anywhere from an hour and 15 to two hours. Depends on the kiddo. And if they’re still in the sleep-wake cycle maturation process, particularly if they have not yet flipped from back to tummy, they’re not might be very short. We sometimes see 30 to 45 minute naps at this time. This is why we get those four to five naps happening.

I wouldn’t panic. If they have short naps, work on independence, work on flipping to belly, you will see them like then as they mature Laura, you said, thanks so much for your response. If we’ve been doing one, not for a few weeks now, should we go back to two naps using your suggested schedule? Yes, it does not matter if you have been on one app schedule for awhile,

if you need to correct an issue with two nap schedule, it doesn’t matter how long you’ve been on that one nap. Julia, you said, I’m assuming we are on mute. My toddler who will be four in January, started a few months waking up in the night again, at least once. Sometimes more. Yes, really? I can’t hear any of you.

Excuse me. So, yeah, don’t worry about your kiddos doing whatever in the background. Although you might be hearing mine. My little ones are home from school this afternoon because my oldest one had an ear, an earache, but it has nothing to do with an ear infection anyway. And as such, she’s totally fine. So your toddler who’s four in January,

started a few months ago, waking up in the night again, at least once, sometimes more. So I would ask about what’s happening in the toddler’s day. Is there any stress or anxiety that hasn’t been addressed? Is there any sort of new situation that has arisen like news daycare, a new school and new teachers that we need to address? Is he overheated?

Is he potty trained? There’s so many different things that could be happening with the four year old waking up overnight. And then finally, how is the sleep hygiene? Is he falling asleep independently at bedtime? Is the room a hundred percent pitch black, maybe with a little bit of light on at this age? Red, red is the color on the spectrum that does not disrupt the production of melatonin.

And if he’s expressed fear of the dark, we could add a red nightlight. Certainly, you know, there’s so many different things that could be going on, but it’s all down to sleep hygiene. So perfectly sleep conducive, environment, age, appropriate, sleep schedule. If he doesn’t nap in the day, making sure his bedtime is early enough so that he can get those 11 to 12,

maybe even 13 hours overnight at this age, working backwards from his morning, we kept time. Does he have a consistent routine at bedtime? Does he get enough physical activity in the day is his nutrition on point? There’s so many different things at four years old that I would investigate to see if we’re optimizing his sleep. All right, Jenelle, you said what’s the ideal nap schedule for an 18 month old?

It definitely depends on whether they’re on one nap or two naps on two naps. We might see two, one hour naps tend to 11, three to four, four week window before bed ish, maybe four and a half, eight to eight 30 bedtime on a one nap schedule. We’re thinking about six hours before the first nap, 1230 a nap. No earlier than that,

not being about two hours or so. And then a four hour, week window ish before bed Maria, you said wondering your suggestions for 26 month old. My son has trouble with the following. It takes him over 30 minutes to fall asleep after bring, putting him to bed one to two weekends throughout the night, early morning wakings at 6:00 AM. So first and foremost,

Marie, I would not consider a 6:00 AM waking as an early morning making a six o’clock waking for toddlers and babies is fair game. That being said, I do say avoid food lightened conversation prior to six 30. Why do I say six 30? Because if we pick them up at six, six can easily become 5 45 and 5 45 can easily become five 30 and then it all sort of goes to hell.

So we don’t want that. So six o’clock our weekends are completely fair game. I would not consider them early wakings, but I would set that earliest morning waking expectation of no earlier than six 30, in terms of taking a long time to fall asleep. This could be due to so many different things is little, one falling asleep independently is their nap too long.

At this age, it’s can start to affect nighttime. So if we’re getting a bedtime that is later than about 8, 8 30, we want to think about cutting the nap down to an hour and a half. And seeing if that helps, that could be part of the case. Wakings overnight could also be related to that inappropriate day schedule. If little one is already an independent sleeper.

Alright. Okay. I will stay with you for one more minute. I’m going to answer one more question, Sarah. You said Julia had the same issue. My son just turned four and he’s also starting waking up in the night again, at least once not ideal since I also have an eight month old, who’s still wakes up occasionally too. All right,

Sarah. See my previous comments. Next question, Alice. My son is three months old sleeps well at night, but during the day only seats on me or my partner. How can we solve this first and foremost, this is extremely common and we would expect them to sleep better on you or your partner during the day, because they’re still going to sleep through the sleep wake cycle maturation process.

Number one thing to do at this age is to work on independence at bedtime and nighttime first, once that’s going well, then you can return to this idea of getting little one to settle in their own space for naps. I would work on not one first because that holds our best chance of success. Make sure you’ve got healthy sleep hygiene in terms of a perfectly sleep conducive environment,

a hundred percent pitch black continuous noise running in the room. Cool enough room. And you’re following age appropriate week. Windows that at this age are between an hour to an hour and a half. Meaning that your little one is never awake for more than an hour or two an hour and a half at any point throughout the day, including before bed working on a consistent bedtime and nap time schedule,

and then working on independence starting from that point after you’ve established that at night. So I never ever suggest working on independent napping in the crib before we’ve established nighttime independence, or certainly at the same time, except in very rare circumstances because your homeostatic sleep pressure is so much higher at night time. If we don’t lock those skills down first, it’s going to be very hard to get them to translate to the daytime.

All right. Hopefully that all makes sense. I do have other calls I need to get to, so I do need to close this off. I think all of you so much for coming to see me today and asking your questions. If you want to learn more about the parent playbook membership, that some of you are a part of that is on the website@parentlybook.com.

And I answer questions like this inside the group all the time. Plus I’ve got a ton of sleep resources inside the membership. So lots of videos of me explaining different things and lots of PDFs, worksheets, all the seek coaching methods that you might need to teach your little one to sleep independently, regardless of how old they are. I’m available inside the group,

along with a full team of child health professionals, including Dr. Dina, my friend and superstar pediatrician. So thank you so much for joining me today and I wish you all the best with the rest of your day. Thank you. Thank you so much. All right, bye bye.



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